In my experience, whenever anyone says "wrap your brain around that", they are inevitably discussing some obvious and trivial thing, but yet they expect you to be set back on your heels and completely amazed.
And, whenever anyone says, "I hate to tell you", they are in their glory. That's a clear sign of snide pleasure being taken at someone else's expense.
i like: no offense but. You just KNOW what's being said will be offensive.
I think I do say "no offense, but..." sometimes, but I believe I never say "wrap your mind around that" or "I hate to tell you." So, because I do use that one, I am defensive over it: I think that when you say that, you are being upfront that you are staying something potentially upsetting, but that you have good will in your heart. Or at least that's how I use it. But with "I hate to tell you", it's just sheer passive-aggressiveness. They love to tell you whatever thing it is they are trotting out to upset you with.
'I'm just sayin' DRIVES ME UP THE WALL!
"I'm just sayin'" is basically an in-your-face way of saying "no offense but." I have used it a few times myself, and it never failed to offend. I'm trying to stamp that one out in myself.
My brother told me that in law school he was told to never say in Court "With all due respect..." because that makes it clear there is no respect.
I often don't like bursting people's bubbles and thus employ the "I hate to tell you this, but your favorite deli has gone out of business."
In that position, Green, I would personally say, "I am so sorry, but that deli has gone out of business. Isn't it terrible?"
In my experience, everyone who has ever said "I hate to tell you this", either to me or to someone else in my presence, perceptibly got off on the other person's discomfiture. I'm sure that does not describe you, though.
Where does my favorite "Neener neener neener, your deli's closed, hah hah" fit in?
You could also say, "God, how did you not know? Do you live under a rock?"
No offense, and with all due reaspect, I'm just sayin' I'm kind of sensitive about that, I prefer "Habitat challenged"
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