So we're leaving in about two hours to jet off to the East Coast. While we are there, we will be spending a weekend on Martha's Vineyard, not only the setting of "Jaws" but also the place where large great white sharks have been legitimately spotted AND also where attention-wanters have claimed to have seen sharks. I am expecting this to trigger Lucy's shark phobias repeatedly. This trip will, more terrifyingly to me, feature my mother-in-law, sister-in-law (the one who makes jeering faces whenever I speak and has proclaimed that she shouldn't have to associate with people from rural New England -- full well knowing I"m from deep Maine), and the half-brother who never acknowledged my existence, and quite possibly his wife, whose existence no one will acknowledge. Sigh. Our marriage therapist laid down the ruling that it would be unrealistic of me to ask the Sober Husband to stand up for me in any way vis-a-vis his incredibly rude family, but instead we should both work on "studying the other person's perspective, like a scientist." At first, I felt like I'd been punched in the gut when I heard that, but later, after I cooled down, I realized it was eminently sensible. Instead, I have decided that as I am a middle-aged former litigator, and I should just feel free to let my over-educated and acidic tongue free should the need arise. Sadly the only inlaw who actually likes me, my manic brother-in-law, will not be in attendance.
On the brighter side, we'll be spending time with some very fun relatives of mine (silent readers of this blog, who dare not speak their caustic minds yet in comments). I'm going to have dinner with my favorite friend from junior high and drag the family to Ogunquit, one of my favorite places on earth.
My personal objectives before leaving included finishing "Who Stole Feminism?" by Christina Hoff Sommers, which I just ripped through; mending a tear in Lucy's beloved Bearie; and reaching level 67 on World of Warcraft with my mage character. I managed to pull all of those off. I loved "Who Stole Feminism?", which so clearly stated issues which were vaguely hovering in my mind. Did you know that Simone de Beauvoir once told Betty Friedan that "No woman should be authorized to stay at home to raise her children. Society should be totally different. Women should not have that choice, precisely because if there is such a choice, too many women will make that one"?
I'll be blogging sporadically from my travels (but then again, I blog sporadically from my own home). Wish me luck and patience and plenty of Prosecco!
Oy. Good luck with the in-laws!
Better that your one favored relation not be there lest he get caught in the crossfire.
Oh, and like Leslie Nielson in "Airplane!", Good luck, we're all counting on you.
(opens cockpit door)
And I just want to tell you, "Good luck, we're all counting on you."
(closes cockpit door)
YOU'RE FROM MAINE?!?!
I *knew* there had to be a reason I like you so much...
And as far as the family goes, let 'er rip on the snark front. Sounds like they deserve it.
2am...and stop calling me Shirley!
"Oh stewardess, I speak jive."
"johnney, what do you make of this?"
"Oh I can make a hat. I can make a brooch..."
Oh, yes, Caroline, I am from Maine! Indeed, I am descended from a long line of poor Downeasters, including most notably the founders of No. Windham, Maine (a totally generic looking suburbanish town).
Post a Comment