Wednesday, February 21, 2007

an ongoing case study: hypochondria in the four year-old

Yesterday Lola mentioned a number of interesting symptoms, but, getting distracted, she didn't develop any of them into a major malady.

First, "there is a green thing here (gesturing towards left side of abdomen) and there is a red thing here (gesturing towards right side of abdomen) and when they meet, they make blue." This was followed by a pained face and a brief hobble to illustrate the horrors of "making blue."

Later we had a resurgence of the bad blood previously observed to have hindered walking activities, but it was described as "all over" and "I am full of blood." This blood was described as "blue and red." Once, a long time ago, I explained to Lola that blood is blue inside our bodies and becomes red when it hits the air, and I think that I should have kept my mouth shut that day.

Finally, we had an assertion that Lola was too sick to go to preschool, but at that point in time, the only symptom claimed was the all-too-believable "I am lazy all over my body." She did go to preschool and had a lovely time. I needed to perform some of my duties as a member of the parent cooperative of the preschool, so lazy-bodied Lola was out of luck.

I'm expecting a lot more hypochondria this week, because Iris Uber Alles has the week off from school. (Iris Uber Alles's school has the shortest schedule of any school I know of, plus more free time, recess, art, music, and P.E. than most children ever get. However, they manage to learn an impressive amount of math and science. I think this is accomplished by (a) amazing student-teacher ratios, (b) breaking the children up into small groups by ability, and let's not forget (c) cherry-picking the applicants). Lola's been really enjoying preschool lately, which she attends four afternoons a week for just three hours a day, but she's hyper-alert to missing out on any mischief Iris Uber Alles and I might get up to without her.


Freewheel said...

At least the hypochondria is not linked to a dislike of school.

On another note...!!!

It's only a matter of time before you go to paid subscriptions.

Fostermama said...

Ohhh, I think that the "lazy all over my body" must be an epidemic. I do believe I have been stricken with it myself a time or two. Including this morning. Perhaps explaining why I am still in my pajamas at quarter to 8.

hughman said...

perhaps lola might become a doctor, especially with her broad grasp at an early age of so much medical knowledge. either that or an old retired woman.