Meandering anecdotes and an occasional incisive comment, courtesy of an overeducated, feminist former-professional, who is continually outsmarted by her overly-gifted children and genius spouse and who seeks refuge in books, cocktails, and the occasional Xanax.
Saturday, May 17, 2008
hurry up and enter the Name Hokgardner's Baby contest!
I'm feeling efficient and like wrapping up all the loose ends (I advise our photo contest winners to write to me about their prizes while this mood prevails; poor Silliyak had to wait aeons for his prize last year). Therefore, let me call your attention to the Name Hokgardner's Baby Contest. I'm giving you a last chance to win before we call it closed. Enter now and have the glamor and glory of having named a real live baby without having to endure labor or pay the baby's college tuition!
no no no! the baby name contest is CLOSED! no latesies!
ReplyDeleteDon't listen to Hughman, everyone. Still open! Hughman wants it closed because he's in the lead for girl's name!
ReplyDeletenot at all!! i'm, um, worried about you working too much. yeah, that's it.
ReplyDeleteTICK TOCK TICK TOCK! where are the results? or at least a new post????
ReplyDeleteH, you're giving me a Hannibal Lechter vibe with the "tick tock" thing.
ReplyDeleteThis comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeleteHow can Hughman be in the lead? TWO of my names were in the Hokgardner's top choices.
ReplyDeleteHere's a few last minute ones:
William Bryce
Garrett William
Cady Allison (just another plug for Cady)
Elizabeth Cady (as in Elizabeth Cady Stanton, always an inspiring choice)
Molly Grace
Ashley Grace (I'm very fond of Grace as a middle name)
Tracy Elizabeth
Just my last minute efforts!
ok,,, tick tock tick tock (shhhhh,,,)
ReplyDeletebetter?
also, Melissa, nice but NO MIDDLE NAMES!! disqualified!!
When did we have to leave off middle names? I distinctly recall DH saying we had to have middle names. Was I hallucinating then?
ReplyDeleteOkay, no middle names.
Ava
Averie
Allison
Claire
Haley
and for boys...
Grant
Garrett
Aidan
Hugh (!)
how's that, baby!
You two are just slaying me. Hugh, I'd not underestimate the powers of the softly spoken Missy. After all, not only has she successfully held the title of Mrs. Drunken Housewife for two years running, she also was a success as a substitute teacher in the public school system. You have to have nerves of steel to be a good sub!
ReplyDeleteI love you both.
Dammit, that was NOT Iris. It was me, the Drunken Housewife. Iris Uber Alles is always borrowing my computer and leaving it logged in to her account. I also suspect she reads my email. Teach a child to read and it's all downhill from there. My life was so much easier when the children were illiterate.
ReplyDeleteDoes anyone else hear "Ruff Ruffman's" voice when they read Hughman's posts?
ReplyDeleteROFLMAO!!!
ReplyDeletei had to look up Ruff Ruffman but i like the connection. is that a bad thing?
the DH has actually heard my voice so i'm not sure if this pertains to her.
I also had to look (hear) up Ruff Ruffman. I'm still hearing Hannibal Lechter. CLARISE! Would you like some fava beans and Chianti?
ReplyDeleteIris Uber Alles was obsessed with Ruff Ruffman the one season it aired on our public TV station. We had to be very, very careful to be home in time and to be silent and to keep Lucy out of her face during the Ruff Ruffman show.
ReplyDeleteruff ruffman gardner.
ReplyDeleteMonica Gardner
ReplyDeletePaulette Gardner
Ian Gardner
Rachel Gardner
I just thought up the perfect name for a girl and I'm going to win both the contest and Hughman's admiration...
ReplyDeleteGreer Gardner
(I hope nobody else already said it.)
And for a boy
Ian
Sean
And, Hughman, I love Ruff Ruffman. That cartoon dog cracks me up.
Darling Anonymous, please use a name of some sort!! If you want to win the love and admiration of Hughman and the contest, we have to be able to distinguish you from the vast herd of anonymouses.
ReplyDelete(Also, I suggested "Ian" already).
smooches, DH
It's me, Kim P., the only true anonymous poster.
ReplyDeleteAww, honey, how the hell are you? I miss you so much!
ReplyDeleteIncidentally if you want to escape the heat again and don't have a place lined up, you could use my house for 2 weeks while I have to go see family on the East Coast...
when is that?
ReplyDeleteI'll be there already from July 11th through the 28th.
Kim
Goodness, I've been offline for a few days, and I missed seeing all these comments. And anonymous, I love the name Greer. That may have just pulled into the lead, provided I can talk mr. hok into it.
ReplyDeletei said Greer too! like Greer Gardner!
ReplyDeleteplus you can't win if you're anonymous! that's cheating!
admit it, Hughman, Greer Gardner is pure magic.
ReplyDeletekim (aka anonymous)
I just realized the perfect boy name . . . HUGH Gardner.
ReplyDeleteHOKGardner tells me that I've voted on the wrong blog (Mad, Mad's instead of Drunken's) so here I go again.
ReplyDeleteI LOVE the name Greer, and I'm the grandmother, so my vote counts double or triple or something.
For girls:
ReplyDeleteEdie (pronounced eee-dee)
Ellie
Callie (or Kali after the goddess of distruction